One year ago I lost the last bit of hope I was tightly holding onto that Levi wouldn’t have Down syndrome.
One year ago I received the amniocentesis results giving us the concrete diagnosis of Down syndrome.
I had prepared myself for this outcome, the odds were not in our favour.
The non-invasive prenatal testing (NIPT) result was 98% for Trisomy 21.
There was a 2% chance that he may not have it and miracles do happen right?
I was offered an amniocentesis which is a diagnostic test in which a sample of amniotic fluid is obtained using a needle inserted into the uterus.
A lot of people turn this testing down if they plan to continue their pregnancy regardless of the results as there are risks associated with the procedure.
So why would I go through with it? 98% on a screening test, why bother?
I needed to know, I couldn’t spend the next 25 weeks of my pregnancy filled with uncertainty.
Just shy of 17 weeks I anxiously walked into the hospital for the amniocentesis alone.
My husband couldn’t be there to hold my hand and keep me calm due to Covid policies.
I am so thankful for the compassionate nurse that was assisting the doctor that day. She could tell I was terrified of the procedure and of the results. She spoke so calmly, she encouraged me to breathe through the pain and tried to distract me away from what was happening through conversation. I was feeling a little light headed and she was so quick to get me juice and a cold cloth for my head.
It was quick and didn’t hurt as much as one would think a rather large needle inserted into the uterus would.
I think the wait for the results was more painful than the actual procedure.
The results were in.
“Consistent with a diagnosis of Down syndrome.”
I knew it was coming so why did it hurt so bad to see it in writing?
The results confirmed that Levi has Translocation Down syndrome.
You know what that procedure results couldn’t tell me?
They couldn’t tell me that my life was about to significantly change for the better.
They couldn’t predict that his smile would light up a room or how contagious his laughter would be.
They couldn’t describe the feeling of how I would feel the first time I set eyes on him.
Remember when I said miracles do happen?
“Do you know that only 20% of eggs with an extra 21st chromosome survives the first cell division? Of that 20% about 20% survive to fertilization? And of that 20% only 20% actually survive the first cell division following fertilization? What are the odds that you have that child in your life? Extremely slim. The only explanation is that your child is a fighter and fought for life from the split second of fertilization. In that regard and in that they can overcome not just one error that should have interrupted life but thousands, makes them super beings. Far stronger than you and I ever will be. For this and so much more, our children deserve admiration.” -Dixie Lawrence
Levi you are a miracle and I wish I saw it that way a year ago.